[Marxism] A possible interruption in my list participation

["Joaquin Bustelo" <jbustelo@xxxxxxxxx>]

        At my recent checkup my doctor detected a small lump on my neck.
After ultrasounds and a CT scan, it has been determined it is a small mass
of tissue of unknown character on/near my tonsils (well, one of them at any
rate). My doctor is urgently sending me to a specialist for evaluation for a
biopsy. My understanding is that once I get into such an office in the next
day or so, if it is a malignancy and surgery or other treatment is possible,
it will be applied immediately, and may put me out of commission for some
time. My *impression* is the radiologist that read the scan and my personal
physician both think it is most likely cancer.

        If that turns out to be the case, I know the best wishes of all the
comrades on the list will be with me; including (and I suspect especially)
those of compas like S Artesian and others I have crossed swords with.

         I don't really need to get --and probably wouldn't see, unless it's
just a false alarm-- a ton of emails with wishes for a swift recovery or,
better yet, that it be nothing. So consider them sent, and greatly
appreciated. 

        As for the what is at this point just a scare --a really bad one-- I
will share one thought in the hopes it might help someone else. It's going
to sound like a bourgeois advertising council PSA, but it can't be helped.

        As I THINK I have already mentioned here, I recently quit smoking,
after having started during the May 1970 student strike. I quit really
FORCED to by a respiratory infection in January that made it virtually
impossible to smoke. Nicotine withdrawal was driving me SO crazy that I got
the patches for that reason. They were so effective in dampening the
withdrawal symptoms that within a couple of days I was toying with the idea
of giving quitting another go. My doctor a couple of days later gave me
"happy pills" that also help diminish cravings (wellbutrin, although of
course I take the cheaper generic). So it was sort of "forced" on me after
having tried (unsuccessfully) several times to quit.

        Had I known how relatively EASY quitting would be, I would have done
it long ago. The irony if I DO have cancer now is that I have not felt this
well for so long (since mid-February) for many years. I sleep much better (I
have sleep apnea, too) and have a ton more energy. That's REALLY when I
decided to quit for good -- my cold/flu or whatever it was forced me to stop
for a couple of weeks and when I was better, and could resume smoking, I
FELT so much better AND the withdrawal symptoms were so well controlled that
I just kept going without buying more cigs.

        ESPECIALLY if you're getting to the lower-energy late middle age,
but at any rate generally, USE the current medical resources to quit
smoking. This is NOT like trying to go cold turkey decades ago. My
experience is that as soon as I got over the flu or cold, having stopped
smoking I FELT better than I had in a long time. And, of course, medical
science says quitting will help reduce your chances of going through a scare
(or worse) like the one I'm going through right now.

        Just one more thought -- given that I had recently quit smoking, and
that at that time there was no lump palpable to the touch on my neck -- it
says to me something about the kind of person the alleged God who goes
around intervening in human history and affairs all the time would be (if
they existed) that I might have developed a smoking-linked cancer now, RIGHT
AFTER quitting. No wonder the Cuban Indian Chief Hatuey refused baptism when
he was about to be burnt at the stake because he didn't want to go to that
heaven.

        I'm not sending this around to other lists or generally to email
addresses but feel free to share it with others who might know me (or my
real-life alter-ego, since as some of you know, JB is a pen name).

Joaquin



        


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