'Humming is Theft' (from the clue train, with greetz to Pathfinder)

["Jose G. Perez" <jg_perez@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>]

Humming is theft, record bosses claim

Teary-eyed CEOs lament the plight of impoverished musicians

by Mitchel Furman

In their continuing struggle to selflessly save the musicians of the world
from penury, all of the leading record company executives have pledged to
"stamp out free humming, wherever it may occur".

"For years people have gone about humming their favourite songs whenever it
took their fancy. Normally this would be a source of pleasure. But this
pleasure came at the expense of lots of hard work from the musicians who are
clearly not getting any compensation for this," screamed an indignant Rilary
Hosen of the Recording Industry Association of America.

To further prove that the RIAA's motivation is not selfish, she flourished
statistics which prove that artists only get about 2.3 per cent of all money
that their work generates. "So they really need every penny they can get,"
sniffled Ms. Hosen through a cascade of tears.

Support from Washington was quick and emphatic. Industry friend and
free-thinker Senator Fritz Lolling made the following statement: "Anyone who
hums and does not pay is a no-good-thieving, commie, kiddie-porn-loving,
drunk-driving, smoke-in-no- smoking section, rat bastard."

The rest is at
http://www.therockalltimes.co.uk/2002/05/27/humming-clampdown.html.


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