Quan on prostituion

[dhenwood@xxxxxxxxx (Doug Henwood)]

Here's Tracy Quan's response to the quote from Marx that likened marriage
to prostitution.

Doug Henwood

>Though not a list member, I have been asked to comment on this
>formulation (or formula) for understanding marital sex.
>
>Marriage has often been compared to prostitution by Marxists -- and by
>very extreme feminists who equate prostitution with rape.  I presume you
>are using Marx to point out the difference between sex which is sold on
>the more-or-less open market and sex which is stolen by force.
>
>But there is something else. This view of marriage -- as a form of
>prostitution -- is probably very middle class in origin. It applies to a very
>specific way of life, and it only makes sense, really, when the
>husband is the sole or primary provider. If the wife brings property,
>savings or a dowry into the marriage, what then?
>
>And, in those situations where the husband is the breadwinner, it is,
>perhaps, the husband who can be viewed as the prostitute -- the wife being
>his "pimp", so to speak, exhorting him to greater and greater financial
>achievements. In marriages where the husband can actually support his
>wife, a certain degree of affluence or ambition is required. Often, the
>wife is a behind-the-scenes "stage mom" -- much like a stereotypical
>"pimp." Well-adjusted husbands who find themselves in that situation
>usually have a sense of humor about it.
>
>I once watched Al Goldstein discussing marriage on his cable show. He
>indicated that, using the monies spent during and after the marriage as a
>guideline, along with the number of times he actually had sex during his
>marriage, each sexual encounter with his spouse had cost him aprox.
>$10,000. Can we make a case for reverse marital rape here? Or shall we say
>he consented and be done with it?




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